abused-untold secrets

Secrets, secrets, everyone has them, I remember way back when my little sister would want to tell me a secret, she would put her ear to my ear and tell me her little secret, it was the cutest thing, she could never get the concept of your mouth goes to the other persons ear, if you can picture it, you would smile as I always did. She loved telling me secrets, and it was most unfortunate I could never tell her mine.

I have been reading other blogs similar to mine and I am finding there are many people out there who have gone through almost the exact same thing as me. They kept their abuse secret for far long too, and they still to this day have trouble talking about it. In my research on survivors of abuse, I found thousands of people suffer ever day with the after effects of child abuse, and no one has reached to out them. They are crippled in many areas of their life, so much so that these innocent people feel lost and hopeless. Doctors, hospitals, pills, dysfunctional family life, some have grown up to be abusers themselves and can't seem to break the cycle. Others live just merely existing struggling to survive the day to day routine of just staying alive. Some continue to suffer because they marry into abuse and suffer at the hands of a spouse, who beats them for no good reason. We hear about this on TV everyday!

 After going through a few struggles of my own over this blog, I can see how and why people keep it a secret. It isn't bad enough we had to go through it as children, but now we have to just live with it and try to get over it alone as adults. It is a private family matter not to be discussed among strangers, and a real shame on me, for sharing it on the net. Then who can we tell? Do we not have the right to heal? Do we have any rights? We sure didn't seem to when we were abused, and it would seem that we don't have any now either.

Well I have good news, for those of you that suffered as I did, we have rights and can expose the truth with out fear. You know how I know? See the first amendment, regarding freedom of speech, religious freedom, freedom of the press, freedom of assembly and right to petition!! Wow we have a lot of freedoms, that's why I love America, I can stand and say what, I have to say with out fear!  I refuse to live with the secrets any longer, I will not be made a captive of my inner self any longer, I need light, love, compassion, understanding, healing, and most of all, ...and... MOST OF ALL...I want child abuse in this country to be exposed for what it is and to make it STOP.   I am finding this to be the hardest thing I have ever done in my life, because it has exposed what is in my past.  I am a respected business woman, and well known in my working community, I can only hope as the blog progresses, that anyone who reads it, will indeed know I was a victim, and will help me by joining the fight against this type of crime.  I am finding so many of you out there, who are afflicted by your abuse, and you can't seem to speak out, you are held captive and imprisoned by your affliction.

 What if so and so finds out?    What will it do to my family?    How will it affect me in my personal life?

 These are questions I still ask myself and all I can come up with is...IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT, YOU DIDN'T GIVE YOUR LIFE AWAY, IT WAS STOLLEN, YOU WERE ABUSED BY SOMEONE WHO KNEW THEY COULD GET AWAY WITH IT!

It's time to break the cycle, there is light, hope and inner peace, I am finding it, and so can you. There are many sites you can go to to for help. Just get on that Internet and start by merely typing in ABUSE, find one you can relate to, talk to someone, a pastor, friend, stranger, any one who will listen, talk to God he is pretty good about listening. But break the cycle, begin to heal and release to become a healthier you.
I  love ya and my arms are around you. Draw from you inner strength and you go with it.

Here a few sites you can visit.
http://www.childhelp.org/
http://childabusesurvivor.ning.com/